Since I haven't left my house for a while, except for smoking breaks, real life conversations have slipped by, and I have to substitute them with arguing with an invisible opponent on the interwebs. I found "The Rules of a Gentleman", a heavy list of over 2 hundred entries. This might be the reason I'm down on my luck with women.
No.3 - Never talk about other girls infront of her.
I had a girlfriend who expected this of me, and she was also an unreasonably jealous bitch. Also, if this is still a rule after the age of 30, the relationship is probably fucked up, and both parties are probably cheating on each other.
No.4 - Learn to play the guitar for her.
"Learn to play the one song she likes at the moment for her." Then realize that the performance after one months playing is very awkward, stop learning the guitar and sell it for 10% of the original value a year later.
No.7 - If she can’t sleep, read her a bedtime story.
When I couldn't sleep and wanted sex, you didn't agree, so why don't you just take your sleeping pills.
No.8 - If you get in a fight with her and she starts crying, just stop and hold her.
"If I'm stupid, it's your fault."
No.9 - Never force her to do anything.
How is this not mutual by default?
No.10 - Call her beautiful, especially when she least expects it.
Like, when she poops?
No.13 - Always make the first move.
I love how this list tries to make rules as if women are somehow more special and important than men, yet visualizes them as fucking incompetent of performing basic human interactions.
No.14 - Never lie to her, she’ll find out.
Again, how is this not mutual by default?
No.15 - Kiss her when she’s sleeping.
Rape
No.16 - Sing to her no matter how terrible your voice is. ..she’ll like it.
No, she won't
No.17 - When she’s fighting with someone, defend her even when you don’t think she’s right.
That's how society gets dumb, but whatever, had sex, right?
No.23 - Never go through her messages.
Because she's cheating on you. This rule is just to make it your fault if you find out.
Also, "No.230- Don’t flip out when your girlfriend wonders who you’re with or what you’re doing. It means she cares and she’s actually afraid to lose you to someone else. "
No.26 - Kiss her in the rain.
How did this become romantic, I don't get it, that's one of the most inconvenient times to kiss.
No.28 - Stay on the call with her even if she fell asleep.
What? Why? Well, alright, but you're not getting that birthday gift you wanted, since I don't have any money left.
No.30 - Give her piggyback rides.
The offer alone will cause an outbreak of "Noooo, I'm too fat, yes I am, don't lie to me, you always lie to me."
No.32 - Apologize when you’re wrong.
Also, apologize when you're right, since she'll just start to cry anyway.
No.34 - Boobs or butts doesn’t matter.
Muscles or label clothing don't either.
No.39 - Don’t swear.
Cussing and hitting is a birthright to women, since they're more emotional and hurting guys is between "cute" and "gurl, u so confident!"
No.41 - Always be the stronger one.
Doesn't comply with other rules, but whatever.
No.42 - Pay for dinner.
Because fuck you.
No.44 - Be a good listener.
Shut up, if you want sex.
No.47 - Don’t use her.
But pay for the dinner, if you want to keep the relationship going.
No.52 - Hang out with her friends too, not just yours.
Even though they only think of you as an asshole since that thing that you did last week.
No.54 - She’s more important than videogames.
And he is more important than chick flicks, shitty books and terrible magazines, so what's the point?
No.55 - Don’t make a promise if you’re gonna break it.
Unless you have a vagina. Seriously, why are these rules listed specifically under mans duties?
No.56 - If she slaps you, you probably deserved it.
Because women are always right. If you slap her, I hope you like prison buttsex.
No.58 - Never slap her, even if it’s just in a joking way.
WHAT
No.62 - Never insult her, even if you’re joking around.
Not even a third, and I'm done, sorry.
The mighty internet wins again.
Thursday, 6 December 2012
Wednesday, 5 December 2012
How does it
Just when I thought music had ended.
Not much going on. I finished a rather rewarding job, missed school again, realized that I'm low on money.
And then, what the fuck, I get a message from Latvia, which makes me all funny inside. Seriously, I'm laughing, and I can't do anything about it. I shouldn't be allowed to talk to girls, because I can't stop falling in love with them.
Moar Kills:
Not much going on. I finished a rather rewarding job, missed school again, realized that I'm low on money.
And then, what the fuck, I get a message from Latvia, which makes me all funny inside. Seriously, I'm laughing, and I can't do anything about it. I shouldn't be allowed to talk to girls, because I can't stop falling in love with them.
Moar Kills:
Monday, 3 December 2012
super indeed
Stereomood does not have songs tagged with "not shit", and it all sounds like shit tonight.
I spent 8 hours in the studio yesterday, despite being excused after I had done every part. Another girl had too much as a director and cried.
Then there's this need to express the things and I can't imagine an appropriate presentation here, and I want more friends in Tallinn.
Music starts to piss me off.
Two girls of interest, both connected to the picture of Allison (stolen from The Kills facebook page). One of them is out of my league yet keeps my hopes up, the other one, besides anything else, has a boyfriend.
I spent 8 hours in the studio yesterday, despite being excused after I had done every part. Another girl had too much as a director and cried.
Then there's this need to express the things and I can't imagine an appropriate presentation here, and I want more friends in Tallinn.
Music starts to piss me off.
Two girls of interest, both connected to the picture of Allison (stolen from The Kills facebook page). One of them is out of my league yet keeps my hopes up, the other one, besides anything else, has a boyfriend.
Saturday, 1 December 2012
Croak
Did I share this already?
Some dreams alright, with a personally touching story that's easy to overcome after I wake up. Like the one I had about the one-of-several summer loves the previous night. That was pretty much Skins. But the one before that, where I'm involved with a fucked up cult, I'd only like to know, what triggered that, what the fuck was the brain doing, when it showed me that. Might be on the same level, where I kill a non-existent brother and divide him up in pieces.
Paragraph removed on 12.12.2012. Every time someone new starts reading the blog, I re-read the most recent entries, just in case. Just in case someone is taking my text too seriously, I removed a few sentences, for peaceful purposes.
Working as a director and helping other directors is messy, requires multitasking skills (which I hardly have) and is also very fun, despite panicking over minor details (I mean, I checked the picture two times already, but what if it's the wrong one, then it would fuck everything up and people will hate me) and working with the first broadcast completely unprepared.
My favorite sweater is a few sizes smaller, thanks, laundry lady. Is this a revenge for the odd number of mismatching socks that I always give you to sort?
The costly drum lessons are not what I expected at all, but still seem a lot of fun.
I liked the party, and some people liked my singing. Some French girl was impressed by my French wine, yesss. Also starting to lose hope to make up my mind about relationships.
Some dreams alright, with a personally touching story that's easy to overcome after I wake up. Like the one I had about the one-of-several summer loves the previous night. That was pretty much Skins. But the one before that, where I'm involved with a fucked up cult, I'd only like to know, what triggered that, what the fuck was the brain doing, when it showed me that. Might be on the same level, where I kill a non-existent brother and divide him up in pieces.
Paragraph removed on 12.12.2012. Every time someone new starts reading the blog, I re-read the most recent entries, just in case. Just in case someone is taking my text too seriously, I removed a few sentences, for peaceful purposes.
Working as a director and helping other directors is messy, requires multitasking skills (which I hardly have) and is also very fun, despite panicking over minor details (I mean, I checked the picture two times already, but what if it's the wrong one, then it would fuck everything up and people will hate me) and working with the first broadcast completely unprepared.
My favorite sweater is a few sizes smaller, thanks, laundry lady. Is this a revenge for the odd number of mismatching socks that I always give you to sort?
The costly drum lessons are not what I expected at all, but still seem a lot of fun.
I liked the party, and some people liked my singing. Some French girl was impressed by my French wine, yesss. Also starting to lose hope to make up my mind about relationships.
Wednesday, 28 November 2012
Three errors
Somewhat hyperactive from the lack of sleep, I talked way too much, creating an inner chaos. While I listen to the advice, I forget it immediately, as in, after five minutes, I just ask too much.
I wrote a story for a homework, but it was in past tense, while it should have been in present tense. The teacher just said that, whatever, read it how it is. So I start to read and somehow automatically switch to present tense after the first paragraph. Then a paranoia makes me believe that the used vocabulary is too complicated and no one understands me, so I also switch to synonyms. Making the whole presentation ear-bleeding bad, with terribly timed pauses and hesitations. I liked the story as it is, coming up with the whole idea and presentation smoothly, and then I ruin it.
Fuck it, will work on it.
Then I, without checking the invitations, ask a couple whether they are coming tonight as well: "Sorry, come where?"
Awkward as fuck.
"I guess we weren't invited."
Fuck fuck fuck.
"You should stop asking."
Yes, I should. Especially, if I made the same mistake two days ago already.
And a few moments later, I see her in the most unsociable mood imaginable, I know she hasn't slept, yet I insist on asking, whether she's fine, if she's obviously not.
"Stop asking so I don't have to answer."
"Yes, sorry."
This all happened within a single hour, and my otherwise high-on-being-busy day has been turned to shit.
Awkward penguin day through and through.
Apparently, I missed the chance to work on my editing homework, as all the Mac's are taken today. Technically, this is my only chance to rest for the next 8 hours or so. Yet, even if I had a chance to lie down, too much stress and, now, guilt. The fucking conscience is driving me crazy for the past years and I can't cope with that.
Choir: 18:30-20:30
Party: 20:00-undefined
Filming: 10:00-15:00
Lecture: 15:00-16:00
Drums: 17:00-18:00
Guaranteed sleep, I think.
School project: 10:00-18:00
And somewhere in the middle, I still have to do the editing.
I hope the wine is good, and, since I think highly of my powers and assume that I ruined my opportunity to share it today completely, the evening should be alright.
Good luck to me and everyone.
I wrote a story for a homework, but it was in past tense, while it should have been in present tense. The teacher just said that, whatever, read it how it is. So I start to read and somehow automatically switch to present tense after the first paragraph. Then a paranoia makes me believe that the used vocabulary is too complicated and no one understands me, so I also switch to synonyms. Making the whole presentation ear-bleeding bad, with terribly timed pauses and hesitations. I liked the story as it is, coming up with the whole idea and presentation smoothly, and then I ruin it.
Fuck it, will work on it.
Then I, without checking the invitations, ask a couple whether they are coming tonight as well: "Sorry, come where?"
Awkward as fuck.
"I guess we weren't invited."
Fuck fuck fuck.
"You should stop asking."
Yes, I should. Especially, if I made the same mistake two days ago already.
And a few moments later, I see her in the most unsociable mood imaginable, I know she hasn't slept, yet I insist on asking, whether she's fine, if she's obviously not.
"Stop asking so I don't have to answer."
"Yes, sorry."
This all happened within a single hour, and my otherwise high-on-being-busy day has been turned to shit.
Awkward penguin day through and through.
Apparently, I missed the chance to work on my editing homework, as all the Mac's are taken today. Technically, this is my only chance to rest for the next 8 hours or so. Yet, even if I had a chance to lie down, too much stress and, now, guilt. The fucking conscience is driving me crazy for the past years and I can't cope with that.
Choir: 18:30-20:30
Party: 20:00-undefined
Filming: 10:00-15:00
Lecture: 15:00-16:00
Drums: 17:00-18:00
Guaranteed sleep, I think.
School project: 10:00-18:00
And somewhere in the middle, I still have to do the editing.
I hope the wine is good, and, since I think highly of my powers and assume that I ruined my opportunity to share it today completely, the evening should be alright.
Good luck to me and everyone.
oh oh
I love alarms going off as I'm still working.
And I love to be wrong sometimes. Earlier today, sorry, yesterday I was once again being angry at myself for the crippled creativity that's hard to overcome. In the last three hours I wrote a story. A homework for a teacher that I don't want to anger, so much motivation comes from that, but still.
In less than two hours, my Wednesday will begin and I have no scheduled time for eating or resting at all. School, editing, possible break, choir, party, hopefully some sleep at night, filming interviews, possible break, school, drum lesson. Definitely sleep.
From the dark corners of 4chan.org:
fuck you, chess
Not only I'm imagining arguments, I actually expect and plan them. Thankfully, anger can partly be diverted by winning assholes from India in chess over internet.
While, just as predicted in South Park, students around me start to get angry, or guilty, towards capitalism, I was just disappointed in a different way - it's impossible to make tea with the mass-produced supermarket-provided black currant jam, probably because of the bullshit ingredients that disappear when water is poured over. I realize that the preservatives do something good to the product, but the homemade jam is what I need right now.
Not only I recall all the conversations, but the mere sight of her from about 10 meters away made me feel devastated . Falling for someone in a relationship is alright, but this is just miserable. I even jumped in my seat when I heard her say some remark in a casual tone somewhere behind me, struggled the instinct to turn my head as well, fuck, this was easier three years ago. And if I fuck something up, hardly anyone to turn to, so the inner fight continues. The negative conclusions are more than the positive, or even acceptable ones; there's always risk, when trying for the good outcome, and I've lost major tactical advantage twice now. If this ain't a prime example of an inner drama, I don't know what is.
In other news, I forgot that I've homework to do, should try it now.
While, just as predicted in South Park, students around me start to get angry, or guilty, towards capitalism, I was just disappointed in a different way - it's impossible to make tea with the mass-produced supermarket-provided black currant jam, probably because of the bullshit ingredients that disappear when water is poured over. I realize that the preservatives do something good to the product, but the homemade jam is what I need right now.
Not only I recall all the conversations, but the mere sight of her from about 10 meters away made me feel devastated . Falling for someone in a relationship is alright, but this is just miserable. I even jumped in my seat when I heard her say some remark in a casual tone somewhere behind me, struggled the instinct to turn my head as well, fuck, this was easier three years ago. And if I fuck something up, hardly anyone to turn to, so the inner fight continues. The negative conclusions are more than the positive, or even acceptable ones; there's always risk, when trying for the good outcome, and I've lost major tactical advantage twice now. If this ain't a prime example of an inner drama, I don't know what is.
In other news, I forgot that I've homework to do, should try it now.
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